AAAUUGHHHHHHH WHYYYYYYYY didn’t I put it in the food processor?!?!?!! That way there wouldn’t be awkward disgusting grains of rice in my brownies. I DON’T FORGIVE MYSELF FOR THIS I AM SO STUPIIIIDDDDDDDD
Ok back to the recipe. But really, I am stupid.
With my leftover Oreo rice, I did the only thing I know how with chocolatey starchy goops: turn them into brownie batter.
Start with some Oreos in a food processor. I think I used 22 Oreos, and maybe 5 or 6 sheets of graham crackers? Crumbs go in a bowl, along with a can of sweetened condensed milk and a teaspoon of vanilla.
After stirring and tasting, I realized that it was painfully sweet and needed something salty and bulky to balance it out. Salted peanuts or pretzels would have been perfect, but I had neither. But you know what I did have?
Mixed them until the chips were all broken up.
Next, into the oven on “medium-low” for 20-ish minutes.
The tops were crackly, and the texture was very brownie-like (albeit a bit dry because mine burned around the edges). So sadly, these cannot be called man bars.
“It’s hot…can I put it in the fridge?”
– Leandro (10 minutes after it came out of the oven)
– Leandro’s mom (after it had chilled)
8 oz cream cheese
4 oz plain yogurt (Greek, if you can get it)
2 tsp vanilla
2/3 c powdered sugar
200 g butter (1.75 sticks) – room temperature
1 package yellow cake mix
1 c dulce de leche repostero (do not use clasico or you will regret it)
Preheat oven to “medium-low.” Maybe 300°?
Mix together TWO (just two) of the eggs with the cream cheese, yogurt, vanilla, and powered sugar with a handheld mixer.
Butter your cake pan and coat it with flour (or a spoonful of cake mix).
In another bowl, cream together the butter and remaining egg. Add the cake mix. It should resemble cookie dough.
Press the cookie dough-esque mixture into the bottom of the pan. Spread the dulce de leche on top, and then pour the cheesecake mixture overtop of that.
Bake for 35-45 minutes or until the center looks mostly set.
These were good by virtue of being man bars, but by way of Oreo-ness, they were nothing special. I couldn’t really tell the Oreos were in there. Must remake recipe with way more Oreos.
“They are meowsome…you can cuddle with them”
3/4 c Almohaditas Crujientes (a.k.a. one of my substitutes for graham crackers – you could also use 1/2 c of graham cracker crumbs)
6 crunchy Quaker oatmeal & granola cookies
1/4 tsp salt
1 cup chocolate chips (or chopped chocolate)
1 can sweetened condensed milk
1 tsp vanilla
1/3 c powdered sugar
Grind the cookies/cereal into crumbs in a food processor, doing the Oreos separately so that you can leave them partially chunky. Deposit crumbs into a bowl with the salt and chocolate chips, and stir to combine.
Add the sweetened condensed milk and vanilla. Stir until it’s 100% incorporated. Eat some of the batter because it honestly tastes better uncooked than it does cooked. I need to figure out how to turn this into a dip.
Bake in a very well-buttered 8×8-inch brownie pan at “medium” for around 25 minutes. When it’s done, the edges will be golden but not burned.